There are not enough hours in a day. And there never will be.
You’re coming home from work, a million thoughts bouncing around in your head. That meeting with your boss in the morning, the emails you need to reply to, and that phone call you’ve been avoiding. But this is work-home transition time. So you are also worrying about making dinner, getting the kids registered for their latest activity and getting the laundry done before you run out of socks.
You feel like you will never be on top of it.
But there is a solution.
One of the things I learned from being on crutches and bed-ridden is that you can always use a little help. And that there is very little that can’t be delegated to someone else. Circumstances forced me to outsource most of my household duties at one time or another. And it worked.
You need to start outsourcing at home; to reduce your household workload.
Why You Aren’t Outsourcing at Home
Most of us have tons of reasons to do everything ourselves. No matter how busy, stressed, and sleep deprived we are, we can’t bring ourselves to have help at home. Even if walking through the door immediately floods us with guilt at the unfinished projects, forgotten hobbies and neglected loved ones.
It’s time to love ourselves as much as our homes. Why you do so much yourself; do any of these apply to you?
1. You need to do it all yourself
What aren’t you doing to make time for housekeeping? Playing a game with your child? Having a bubble bath? Learning to knit? Life is busy and time is short; don’t miss out on any of the good stuff to do chores.
2. Your mom did it all
Mine did, or did she? Mine did when she was working part-time, but by the time she was working 16 hour days, I was old enough to help. Is what you are trying to live up to real or is it only a partial picture?
The other question is: did she work that hard, so that hopefully you wouldn’t have to?
3. Your household isn’t on board
Many times you and your partner don’t agree on how much is too much. If they are doing half the work then it may be a difficult negotiation. But if you are carrying most of the load, then fight for yourself. Maybe if they experience the full brunt of your workload, they will understand. Try redistributing the work evenly for two weeks; you’ll get a much-needed rest and they will get a reality check.
4. You can’t afford it
Maybe that’s true, maybe it’s not. If you make $10 an hour, is there something you can outsource for $5/hour? (Examples in a future post) Maybe you can trade chores with a friend. Maybe she could send her house cleaner to your place a few hours a week and you could do her laundry? Or take turns cooking meals with a neighbor.
A friend and I were both a little strapped for cash, but needed some personal time, so every week we would trade kids. For 3 hours every two weeks I could get some errands done.
When I was recuperating, I had no income, but needed some household help. I found a mom who needed a job where she could bring her daughter. She was willing to work very inexpensively for flexibility.
5. You are a perfectionist
Maybe you think nobody does it as well as you. You are right, I guarantee it.
Nobody will ever do things exactly as you would, but what is more important, your standards or your time? Probably both. So finding the balance is the key.
Surely there are some things that don’t need to meet your exacting standards. Don’t outsource your highest priority, do that yourself if you choose. But there will be some things that others could do well enough. As far as getting what you want, communication and perseverance will get you most of the way there. After that, you need to manage your expectations and learn acceptance. Take it from another perfectionist; it is worth it.
But let me give you one reason to try it.
Why You Should Outsource
1. Your time has value
There is probably a bunch of reasons, but I will only give you one. Your time is valuable. Really valuable. It is one of the biggest causes of stress. Giving yourself a little more time is the kindest thing you can do for yourself.
Imagine what you would do with a little more of it?
Studies show that you can buy happiness. What would you do with a little more time? Would it make you happier than chores?
What would you pay for an extra day every few weeks? So you could have a 2 hour bubble bath or watch your favorite movie?
What other reasons do you have for choosing chores over recreation? For choosing house over self? Or family and friends? Or career? And is it worth it?
Check out our series on outsourcing at home.
